The charity Action for Children has shared some tips on how to support a child a SEND child this Christmas.
Christmas can be hard for your child if they struggle with crowds, noises and changes in routine. The festive period can be overwhelming for autistic children and children with ADHD, sensory issues or anxiety.
It can help to plan and adapt your celebrations around your child’s needs.
Make a list
Make a list of what your child finds difficult. The list will be unique to your child because every child will cope with Christmas in different ways.
Try to think about when they might experience these things. Think about whether you can avoid those situations or help your child prepare.
Prepare them for gifts
Some children find surprise gifts overwhelming. You might want to let them know what type of gifts they will open and when this will happen.
For example, you could tell them you will give them a book and the surprise is which book you choose. It can also help to:
spread gift giving over the day or different days
give gifts without wrapping
allow them to open gifts away from others or at the same time as other people, so they don’t feel like they’re being watched
talk to friends and family to explain that your child’s responses to gifts might not be what they expect
Involve your child in decisions
Involve your child in some decisions. For example, ask them to help you choose decorations they feel comfortable with. This could be lights, colours and textures.
Speak to their school
Find out what’s happening at your child’s school or nursery. Celebrations could include shows, parties, lunches or Christmas jumper days.
This could become overwhelming for some children. If you feel your child may need extra support during these times, try to speak to the school before the event so they can plan to support your child.
Plan for visitors and outings
If your child struggles with people visiting your home or going out, think about how you can help. You could:
see if your child wants to stay at home with another family member when you go out
ask if they want to play in a different room
share pictures of people in advance, so they’re familiar with their faces
let your child stay with you if they want to when at other houses
Consider food, smells, sounds and textures
Different food, smells and sounds or textures may upset some children. At Christmas, this could be noisy toys, perfume, scratchy jumpers or the expectation to eat something different.
If it helps, you can:
warn them about some of the things they may see, hear and smell
let them know they can opt out of wearing certain clothing if it’s uncomfortable
try to protect their bedroom from new smells
give them familiar scents to wear (try essential oil rollers or lip balm on their wrists)
avoid buying loud or overly stimulating toys
offer ear defenders
serve up their usual favourite food, if the Christmas meal is a problem for them
Create a safe space
Keep at least one room in the house free of decoration. Try to make sure it looks like it usually does. This can be a safe space for your child if they feel overwhelmed.
Manage changes in routine
Prepare your child each day for what’s coming the next day. Talk to them about who will be there, what they will do and what they’ll eat. If your child uses picture cards or sign language to communicate, start using signs for the new activities ahead of time to help their understanding.
Some children might like to have some control over some of these things. You could give them a choice between two different activities.
Try to keep some of their routine the same. It can be helpful to start and end their day with something you would usually do. Think about morning routines, as well as bath time, bedtime and story time.
This advice was written by Action for Children's experienced Parent Talk coaches. Parent Talk is a free online service for parents and carers, provided by the charity Action for Children. For more advice, message their parenting coaches with their online chat.
Action for Children is a great resource for parents and carers of children and young people with SEND and SEMH difficulties - take a look at their website for more information.
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